September 10, 2001

Nine years ago today, I got home and got a phone call from a girlfriend of mine. She and her husband were fighting and she was upset. She wanted to know if worse came to worse, could she stay at my house? I told her of course she could.

Then I called another girlfriend of mine to tell her how down I was feeling. She proceeded to unload all of her problems on me, and I ended up not having a chance to vent.

By the time Marc got home that night I was almost in tears feeling overwhelmed at all the drama that had been foisted on me. Luckily, the first half of "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" was on that night and I got the chance to laugh.

Of course, the next morning none of that mattered anymore. The world I knew, the New York I had just explored that winter was changed forever.

I hope I never forget the horror of that day. Remembering what we went through that day is a constant reminder to live a responsible fulfilling life, to make up for the lives that were lost.

Two way auditions

So, I've been out of work now for a few weeks. I've been sending out 5 to 10 resumes a day and interviewing with everyone who is willing to meet with me. And here I am, still looking.

Anyway, I got a phone call yesterday in response to a resume I sent in for an administrative assistant job. The business owner told me he was in construction and there were only two people in the office, although during the busy season he often has a crew of 8 or 9. So I went in for the interview this morning. I was feeling a bit against this position , mostly because in an office with so few employees benefits can be quite sketchy. Also, construction has to run thin in bad weather, and in Oregon the weather is often bad for business. Therefore, I know that admin. ass't positions are likely to get hours cut in the winter.

It didn't look any more stable when I got to the office. The owner kept me waiting for 20 minutes, then blamed it on his being long winded when he's talking to someone. In my experience, anyone who keeps a possible employee waiting like that will do the same to clients, ensuring short lived and unpleasant working relationships.

Once the interview started he looked over my resume, and noting that I had been in the insurance biz he began stating his opinions on health insurance. He then asked me for my opinion. Please understand, if the guy hadn't already shown me how irresponsible he is in running his office I NEVER WOULD HAVE ANSWERED HIS QUESTION. After giving him my opinion, he went on to lecture me on why I'm wrong. After half an hour of it I stood up, told him the interview was over and that I would never be comfortable working with him.

The moral is...while interviewing, always remember a job needs to be a good fit for all parties. Don't settle for a job out of desperation if it means working for a douchebag.

An amusing week...

So, last Friday was my last shift at my part time job. I'm doing well enough for myself now that I don't need it, which is a releif. It was also pretty funny, because the manager I worked with that night totally embarrassed a teenage couple that was loitering in front of our store, which made me laugh so hard I cried.

Then it was off to SoCal to spend my birthday with my parents. Had a great time, as was expected. I also hung out with some friends, including my ex. Turns out he has a new girlfriend, and I know her because they worked together when he and I were still together. My words of advice? "Don't fuck this one up." I wish him all the best. He deserves after putting up with me for all those years.

I picked up the Sumatran Rat Monkey from jail (otherwise known as the PetsHotel) on Wednesday. He's been tuckered out ever since. Who knew all day playtime could be so draining? He's so cute when he sleeps.

Seeing as it's Friday the 13th, I've been forcing myself to watch the movie series. At least the first four. New experiences are good for me, correct?

How far gone?

So, I met someone new a few weeks ago.  We spent about a month talking on line, by phone and by text message.

At first I wasn't sure about this guy, but the more we communicated the more I could see how much we had in common, and how much fun we could have together if we met in person.

So we met for dinner downtown about a week and half ago.  It was a great evening.  Dinner, dessert, drinks afterwards, lots of conversation and getting to know each other.  And we made plans to get together then next Sunday.

Talking the day after our date, we decided to get together for dinner on Saturday night too because there was a restaurant I knew of that I thought he'd like.  We had another great night, just hanging out, talking and enjoying each others' company.

Sunday morning he text'd me to say he couldn't make it for our plans that afternoon.  No problem, I was kind of tired and could use a day without any plans, so we decided to get together the next weekend instead, and maybe cook dinner together sometime during the week.  He must really like me, huh?

Turns out things weren't going as well as I thought.  On Thursday he e-mailed me to say he's been hanging out with his ex, and that with the weather getting colder he's not up to going out a lot, so he wished me well in finding someone else.  What I find funny is the fact that I already knew what was going to happen.  I could recognize a pattern that occurs in my life fairly often, and I knew that no matter how well everything had gone up to that point, that he wasn't as into me as I had hoped for.

So, at what point can you say that someone has broken up with you?  Do you have to be officially boy/girlfriend?  Seeing each other exclusively?  Or can it just be when you find someone that you're so comfortable with and attracted to that you can see having a future together, and finding out he doesn't feel the same?  

And I hadn't even been drinking...

So, last night I had a dream that I was at work, studying for my life insurance exam on-line (yeah, who would have thought that?).

Here's the twist...instead of reading info off the website, the info was in the guise of a horror movie. So, I guess the point was to not only watch stupid teenagers get hacked to pieces by a derranged killer, but to watch the survivors collect the death benefits. Novel idea, no?

Anyway, true to form, watching this "movie" started to freak me out, so I paused it. At that point, my boss walked out, saw what was paused on my monitor, and started up the movie again while gleefully saying, "Great! Here's where they find his decapitated head!"